[written June 18, 2015 – an example of Healing my Heart… and Finding Some Joy]
Normally I’m someone who wakes up in the morning excited about who I will meet, what I will learn. But today the skies are literally a metaphor for how I’m feeling; they’re gray and plump with humidity with the threat of an oncoming storm – a bit of sunlight would help right now please 🙂
I have been feeling the pressure of what I want to accomplish so that I can support myself financially and I won’t have to get a side-JOB (while building my business in Chicago after I moved back home). I KNOW that I already have everything I need in order to create this success, but I have been having a hard time getting out of my own way!
Especially lately, I have continued to feel overwhelmed. The biggest thing I have stressed about is choosing the focus of my business. Things have changed since I first started my practice, I feel there is a much broader purpose. I have such a wide diversity of interests, yet when I think of my biggest accomplishment that I might be able to share with others, besides gratefully raising two beautiful, healthy souls holistically, is the devotion I have to my personal growth.
For me, what comes with personal growth is choosing to explore and seek out what speaks to my heart. And the adventurer and explorer in me thrives on this adrenaline and excitement of discovery. Whether it’s finding the ideal tool that DICTATION provides to quickly get thoughts out of my mind. Or being reminded of the simple youthful joy of sticking my tongue back out at a little boy who did it to me first while on my walk.:-) Every little step reminds me of what is truly important.
[Note – I literally dictated the process that I just went through to calm myself down, feel more centered, and then see my big AHA! 🙂 ]
* do something that makes you feel better for the moment. Normally my favorite thing to do in this type of emotional state is go for a walk. But it’s raining really hard so I am sitting in my small, covered sunroom sitting on the outdoor furniture cushions watching and listening to the rain and feeling a bit calmer.
* I am careful about the “tense” that I use when I think and write and talk out loud. I know how much energy our thoughts and words have. When I have troubling thoughts, I have taught myself to red flag if I make a negative statement or comment in the present tense. I will even say “cancel cancel cancel ” to neutralize the negative energy that I just “claimed” for myself; for me, it’s like I’m putting my fingers over my mouth and telling Universe OOPS ;-). [Okay that’s good I’m starting to see a bit of my humor 😉 ]
* writing can help so much! I honestly started this post just to relieve the continual pinball effect in my brain, and just get some of these thoughts out of my head. Although only a few moments ago I was feeling a lot of angst, I’m already feeling the pressure relief. Subconsciously with all the lessons I’ve learned, I knew that when I’m feeling inner conflict, universe is really nudging me out of the nest, it’s time to take the next step, learn a new lesson.
* ahhhh … My AHA right now is that I’m meant to share what I’ve learned along this personal growth journey. When I have been there for a friend or family member when they are going through a hard time, in addition to just being there for them while they talk, I will share something that has helped me in a similar moment. It may even be one of the processes that I made up for myself while trying to understand something better about myself. They tell me then or later how much these have helped.
We all intellectually know that we’re not the only ones that go through a hard time. But sometimes it can feel that way, doesn’t it? How does everyone else have it all figured out?! What do they know that I don’t know yet? Why is it taking so long?!
On my personal growth journey, I can’t tell you the number of books and articles and videos and workshops that I have read and watched and participated in since I was a child(!). Seriously, with an incredibly strong desire for my heart to feel happier and lighter, second only to wanting to be the best mom possible later on, I can say that my second biggest accomplishment is the time and practice I have put into healing and taking the next step forward toward feeling more peace in my heart. Wow…that in itself is actually a revelation while I’m acknowledging it right now.
What was intended to be a journal entry to help myself, I am choosing to share and post this in my blog. Perhaps my process can help you feel better in the moment, and it will bring comfort in reminding you that you’re not alone, and that you’re being lovingly nudged by Universe because you’re Ready to take the next healing step. <3
I recently went through a course that helped me to identify my true purpose. Kristen Domingue’s process help to me finally articulate what has been my heart’s mantra my entire life.
To encourage souls to connect with the beauty of their life adventure.
It has just naturally been the driving force behind every moment of awe, smile, hug, every word of comfort or shared advice, and most of all behind how I felt a very deep need to help others in some way.
Although I have already had my heart-rewarding holistic health practice for over 15 years, the more powerful and impactful way that I knew was possible for me to help others with emotional, spiritual and physical healing and stepping forward in greater self- empowerment has been just beyond my reach. Not being able to understand how I could best accomplish this has left me at a loss for words and direction. I feel I have my How … Thank you thank you thank you <3 :-D))))
And the irony is not lost on me … The downpour has stopped and the sun is starting to peek out. I can go through my day with a more peaceful heart 🙂
